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March 27, 2008



Your kitchen routine is pretty similar to mine. Except we have food, but never want to go to the trouble of defrosting and cooking whatever meat ingredient is needed for what we want to eat. So we whine about not having anything to eat and then order a pizza.

blogging barbie

"Arrive home anywhere between 6:30 and 7:30pm. Tired. Pour yourself a drink. Open refrigerator and realize that no fairy elves have done your grocery shopping for you, and you still only have mustard, ketchup, and that same mold-cultivating tupperware container. Go to pantry and see two boxes of microwave popcorn, three cans of Rotel, and a can of Healthy Choice soup that you've had since before you got married. Slam the pantry door and yell to anyone who's listening that there's nothing to eat."

....oh hai. do we live in the same household? yes? awesome. thought so. xo


the first "ideal" setting sounds a little too valley of the dolls for me. I prefer dinner unplanned, and covered in cheese. ALWAYS HAVE THE CHEESE.

my dinner routine is like this: arrive home. Open bottle of wine. Realize that I'd rather take a nap than cook/eat. Sleep. Wake up, finish bottle of wine, pass out.

Now when a man is looking for a wife like that, you just let me know.


Hmmm, I don't plan ahead but I do normally have a bunch of raw ingredients and clean up as I go. We combat the nothing to eat issue by really stocking up on staples when they are on sale. We do normally leave the dishes until the next day. And we almost always eat in the living room watching Netflix.


Uh, I hate to admit this, but we are kind of like Scenario #1. Except that we don't clean as we go. The non-cook of the night is stuck to clean up whatever disaster remains. Oh, and we are not always very cheerful at the end of the workday.

I fully admit that we are completely anal about meal planning and grocery shopping, but it works for us!

Operation Pink Herring

I arrive home around 7pm, sweaty and tired from the work and the gym. I put down my bags, pet my cats, say "who's my snoogly-boogly? WHO IS? YOU ARE!" a few million times. Flip on kitchen TV, change channel to TNT Law and Order reruns if needed.

If I wasn't extremely late for work that morning, possibly I took something out of the freezer to defrost. If not, I begin scanning my braid to see what I'm craving most. Dinner is always based on what I'm craving because I'm the cook. Period.

I start cooking whatever and run upstairs to shower while the food cooks/burns. Joel is usually home by this time and is either in front of the computer or watching TV upstairs. After my shower, I go back downstairs to see just how burned dinner is.

While whatever is cooking finishes, I'll either make a salad, clean something, or do dishes... this makes me feel super productive, but doesn't suck because at the same time I'm watching Law and Order on the kitchen TV.

When dinner is ready, we take it upstairs to our coffee table and turn off the TV for the ten minutes it takes to eat. Then we leave the dishes on the coffee table and argue about who's turn it is to take them all the way downstairs.

The end.


Audrey - I should have mentioned pizza in my scenario. That happens fairly often as well.

Blogging Barbie - Yay! I knew we would get along. Also, I'm sorry. Why can't we get more organized?

Tiff - I would imagine that you save both time AND money with that wine bottle per night deal you've got going. So I am going to applaud you for that. Congrats!

Rachel - I think this is more like something I could (possibly?) aspire towards. I just don't see myself planning everything out at the start of the week, but this concept of "keeping staples on hand" is intriguing :)

RA - WHY would you be afraid to admit you are like my ideal scenario? I aspire to BE you! Be proud! And if you type out your menu and grocery list every week, just copy that into an email and forward it to me, mmkay?

OPH - So you're saying I need a kitchen tv...


I keep hoping that I'll be in Scenario A when AS and I move in together... I am closing this window PRONTO before you can disillusion me any further.


ours is eerily similar, except where are you getting these 88 cent eggs cause my eggs are like 3.79 these days? And we don't eat out (no fast food in the neighborhood, not that I'm above it) but we eat frozen things. Like bertolli pasta meal in a bags. Yum, you should buy some of those. Very easy into fooling your own self that you cooked, you really cooked!



btw, i haven't read the rest of the post yet, i just wanted to say that. i skimmed the other comments and didn't immediately see someone say that, so...... what do i win?


I've got this thing totally hacked. Finally.

About once a month I order staples from Amazon. Really. Couscous, pasta, rice, olives, sauces, salad dressing, granola--basic ingredients, no planning, just click and buy. Things that last for months.

Then every week or two on a weekend, go to the farmers market and/or grocery early for fresh stuff and everything for a gorgeous for a no-cook brunch on the porch--french bread or muffins or bagels, berries, fruit, chocolate,cream for the coffee, yogurt or cream cheese and lox. Then hours of reading, lounging and eating are the reward.

The reward is the key part.


Laurel - hee hee, let me know how that works for you (giggling evilly)

Janet - my husband is FAMOUS for over-exaggerating in the extreme to make his point, whatever it is. I seriously doubt our eggs here are any cheaper than yours, and to prove his Exaggerate-In-Any-Direction mentality, allow me to present you with this: One of our hugest fights happened in the grocery store when I wanted to buy the pack of eggs with 18, and he ranted and raved about how expensive it was, and why would I ever do that, and how would we ever eat so many eggs, and so on and so forth. He's a master - of annoyance.

Kyle - YAY! You win my utmost respect, and if you'll let me know a good address, I'll send you a Busy Bee as well :)

Deb - the Amazon thing sounds too good to be true. I am holding off my initial excitement because I feel like there must be a catch...are you teasing me?


I dont know where you're finding eggs for 88 cents a dozen. I pay 2x that.

hmm cooking in my apt = not cooking. I'll usually throw the pasta on boiling water and sit on the counter watching it while nursing my jack on the rocks and wishing I had a man to come cook something fabulous.

but good news! the new guys next door love to cook apparently. not how to get them over...


HAHAHA, 'Best in Show' is the. best. movie. ever.

I am just envious that you actually HAVE a working kitchen. I'm sure when ours is finally finished, we'll be right there with you and Cody in scenario 2.


Oh. My. God. "Because they NEVER PUT ANYTHING IN THE DISHWASHER. Why would they, when the sink's right there? And surely someone else (always you) will come by and put the plate into the dishwasher for them." Oh my god, ohmygod, omigah! I know that feeling so well that it made me a little queasy just reading it.

I can't tell you the feeling I get when I see that one stupid dish in the sink, knowing that the rest of the dishes are dirty in the dishwasher. I hear the Jaws theme as I walk up to my sink, and let out a blood-curdling scream when I see it there: smears of condiments along the perimeter, water hanging out in the middle from his pathetic little attempt at "rinsing" it, the knife and fork akimbo on the rim. This vision haunts my dreams.

Because, seriously, dude. IT'S RIGHT THERE. Would that slight bend of his waist have killed him? Apparently so. And if THAT doesn't kill him, I might have to.


I actually love to cook, and I'm a planner. so I will pick 4-5 meals from my magazines, food blogs, or some of our "usuals" that I haven't made in awhile and make a list and go shopping each week.

BUT, then once a week or so we have nights like last night. The semi-elaborate meal I had planned was just too much effort. So instead, we sat around for half an hour, saying "You decide what we are eating." "No, YOU decide, I ALWAYS make our meal decisions." "Well, I don't care what we eat." "Well, you're the hungry one, so you pick."

And then, once we FINALLY settled on pizza, there was the "I'm too tired to order, you order" debate.

But OF COURSE we ate it on nice plates, at the table. When sometimes my nice, took an hour to cook meals get scarfed up on the couch with the TV on.

Ahhh, gotta love it!


I actually love to cook, and I'm a planner. so I will pick 4-5 meals from my magazines, food blogs, or some of our "usuals" that I haven't made in awhile and make a list and go shopping each week.

BUT, then once a week or so we have nights like last night. The semi-elaborate meal I had planned was just too much effort. So instead, we sat around for half an hour, saying "You decide what we are eating." "No, YOU decide, I ALWAYS make our meal decisions." "Well, I don't care what we eat." "Well, you're the hungry one, so you pick."

And then, once we FINALLY settled on pizza, there was the "I'm too tired to order, you order" debate.

But OF COURSE we ate it on nice plates, at the table. When sometimes my nice, took an hour to cook meals get scarfed up on the couch with the TV on.

Ahhh, gotta love it!


I Want more details on that Amazon thing!


Between the helpful hints, the recipes, the ORDERING FOOD ONLINE (yes!), and the commiseration about poor cooking skillz (or mad lazy skillz), I have to say:

I love you all.

And poor Anna, I could smell the steamy anger coming from her dishwasher tirade, and let me tell you, girlie. I FEEL YA. I REALLY, REALLY DO.


I grew up with Scenario # 1. Mom was a house wife for most of my life. Dinner was served prompty at 6:00. Kids helped set the table, cleared the table and did dishes. A lot of bickering and fighting involved. Dad retired to the bathroom with the National Geographic. Mom took a shower and threatened us with more chores if we didn't get along.

Today: Hub-E and I are pretty much exactly like you and Cody. Your post is so hilarious because it hits so close to home.

Hub-E gets home before I do. I get home at 5:50 and find him at the computer. Open the fridge, note the two shelves full of condiments, sauces, and the 12 different kinds of mustard, the eggs, bottles of beer, and old wilted vegetables that we got at farmers market but haven't cooked up yet. Open the cupboard door to find canned everything from 1999, dry pasta, and rice. If we have cheese, dinner is usually cheese and crakcers with mustard on top. If we're out of cheese: dinner is sometimes nothing, sometimes cereal, somtimes fast food, sometimes ice cream.

That's life in families where both spouses work. I think everyday that I'd have absolutely no problem being Susie Homemaker wearing an apron and greeting spouse at the door with a "hello, dear" and a glass of juice. Sure, I'll do all the laundry and clean the house and cook dinner. Because THAT would be my job. But I won't do it when I already have a job. No way. Sucks, doesn't it?


Oh how I absolutely adore Anna's comment. I am LMAO at that. The Jaws music! I can soooo feel her anger with that little dish left in the sink with the sorry excuse of being rinsed.

And don't forget the empty beer and wine bottles left out on the counter because someone can't manage to put them in the recycling outside or even in the bucket in teh gargage. Oh I want to scream when I see empty bottles on the countertop.

And then there's the icky wadded up towels that somone uses to wipe stuff up from the floor with and the stove with and then thinks that they can still be used to dry the pots with? Umm, hello? Heck no!

Oh, and the spattered stove that I JUST.CLEANED for the umpteenth time. Seriously, it doesn't get used unless it is shiny clean and then someone comes along and cooks up a fried mess and then I have to clean it again. If I go a few days without cleaning it, we don't get dinner. It's odd how it works that way.

And one last thing: Hub-E has taken to using the dining room chairs as his closet. I come home everyday to see shirts and jackets draped over one of the chairs and it makes me want to hit something.


Oh my goodness, the dining room chairs as closet space. This is a new one for us as well, but I have not had both barstools sitting "naked" in about two months. As soon as Cody removes one jacket from the back of the chair (usually because I nagged him until he more than likely wanted to cover my head with the jacket) he replaces it with a new one. And he leaves his red soccer bag in the breakfast room chairs EVERY WEEK AFTER HIS GAME, WHY, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WOULD YOU DO THAT? Is the closet really THAT far? Do you think smelly soccer socks go well with cereal in the morning? Why the kitchen?

Kerri Anne

Somewhat surprisingly (because I just started liking cooking about two weeks ago) our nightly kitchen routine is very close to Scenario The First, sans children, a dishwasher and actually eating at the kitchen table, because it's totally broken.


OMG. There really is a Grocery department at Amazon. And stuff SHIPS FOR FREE with Super Saver Shipping.

I am in ecstasy.

And they are running a Spring Clearance special whereby you get $10 off an order of $25 or more in select items. CLEARANCE GROCERIES. And FREE SHIPPING. Oh holy.

Teacher A

I'm sure you've gotten plenty of awesome advice by now, but I still have to put in my $0.02.

Start small. That's probably the best recommendation I can give you. For quite a while R and I survived on boxed noodles (Pasta Roni) and salads (salad from a bag, ranch dressing, croutons, grated Parmesan to fancy it up a bit).

Once you get used to cooking (and having ingredients at home), you can start being a little more adventurous. On those shopping trips you will now occasionally take (or online grocery purchases), pick up the ingredients for one or two recipes you want to make before the next time you go shopping.


Hubs and I have a system. Every Sunday we head to the store, pick out lunches and dinners for the week, and before getting to work in the morning, pull something out. I have to say, my husband is NOT a planner, whereas I am. However, this system has worked brilliantly! He cooks - most of the time. I do the dishes in the morning and all is happy and well in the world of kitchen :)


Elise, I may sound like an old woman here, but I have a solution for you: the crock pot. I'm not even kidding.

Go to Amazon or Half (dot) com and order a slow cooker cook book. Try to find one with a section of recipes that are five ingredients or less (really! they do exist!) and order that.

Once you get the book in the mail, choose three recipes per week that you'd like to try, return to Amazon and order groceries for the alloted number of weeks.

Sit back and wait until those groceries arrive on your doorstep. In the meantime, exist on Ramen noodles and cereal. Once ingredients arrive, prepare a full recipe of whatever you want to eat and plan to eat it for two dinners or one lunch and one dinner for both you and Cody. Try to get three to four meals out of each recipe.

Additionally, go to Sam's or Costco and buy staple foods in bulk. I get the feeling you really do want to cook but that you feel like you have to go spend money to do it and at that point, you may as well just have someone else cook. Am I right? This is why the price club is our friend.

To all you commentators: You now have me scared of getting married and living with a boy. Although, my particular man seems to have been well-trained by his OCD mother. Ahem. Fingers crossed.


We have a freezer full of meat, fish, berries and what-not. We have potatoes and home-made preserves in the basement - and I can still relate to all of the dinner-woes described, because we're just as disorganised as everyone else. There's just one more wrinkle to my scenario - we live 50 km (30 miles) from the nearest store, pizza place or hotdog-stand... I guess that's why we're on our 3rd toaster in less than 10 years!
Oh and Chiada - have you by any chance been over at our house? Empties on the counter, chairs as closets and the lot, that sounds all too familiar!

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