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October 17, 2007



Sheesh. Makes me glad I don't travel by plane very often. Also, a movie quote comes to mind: Austin Powers as he comes out of deep freeze when he yells "WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE!?!" That's the sort of thing that would be going through my mind in that situation. Then my husband would do more than the OWDL. He'd most likely turn around, stare hardly at them, point his finger, and say something in a very stern voice like "HEY. You need to keep it down. This is a public plane and nobody wants to hear your screaming. Now. Can you behave like adults? Or do I need to call the flight attendent?" Oh yes, he's quite the guard dog. Not afraid to speak up to idiots. This used to embarras me when he'd actually get out of his car and pick up a cigarette from the road that somebody in front of him had just tossed out the window. He'd hand it back to them and tell them off for it. I've pretty much gotten over my embarrassment and learned to just accept it. Oi.


I am laughing like crazy at this story... while you had special misery with your travel companions and the airline staff, the misery of air travel is universal to us all.

Although, I will say that two weekends ago, I had a lovely plane ride (with cookies) home to Minnesota. So I guess that I got all the "good flight" vibes and you got all the bad. Sorry 'bout that!


Ah... planes. Gotta love 'em. I'm not looking forward to 24 hours on one between Sydney and London. Hope there are no Jerry Springer crazies behind me.

In littler numbers, I'm going from Sydney to the Gold Coast next week via domestic planes, which are smaller and generally carry more wacky travellers. I shall keep any good stories saved up to relay back!


Chiada - whoa, your husband is a badass! I am totally impressed.

Laurel - sure, you got cookies, but I got to smell the sweet aroma of cigarette smoke-doused clothing and hair for a good hour. And that, m'dear, is hard to beat.

Alynda - yes, yes! Please give me an Aussie version of this story! What do you call these types over there? :)


Fighting the Puking. I FEEL YOU.

Chaos Control

At least they provided free entertainment, no?


Yep, I'm a plane puker, too.


Glad you did'nt have to use the bag! I sent a sick girl to the nurse with a trash can in hand last week..haha..I wasn't getting near it! Aren't I sensitive?
Speaking of..I really can't stand rude people in close spaces like that! I feel sorry for the old lady :( Glad it's all over!


so many funny parts to this post. i especially like the OWDLs because i SO know what those look like. haha.

and i can't believe they made all that fuss about you being "already boarded" but someone just waltzed onto the plane without even being "scanned in". ridiculous.


Holy shite.
You cannot make this stuff up.

And what happened to the lady that just got on the plane without the attendant scanning her ticket??
Did she exist? lol

Oh man.


it sounds like they were using bus etiquette on a plane. (of course this means not using etiquette at all, but basically this is what it's like to ride the bus!)

blogging barbie

oh my dear lord. as a frequent flyer, this story made me laugh. which i def needed today. hopefully you'll have better luck in the future with flights.

and for the record. i probably would have lost my shit to the bitchy flight woman scanner. a big "bahhh" to her!


on my flight from orlando a few days ago, there was a semi-elderly woman behind me who pulled the same trick when the plane stopped: she began trying to fight her way out quicker than everyone else. she literally pushed past me in an effort to get out. however, as we were at least 10 rows back, the thick crowd blocked her way, and as she nudged people - "excuse me, excuse me" - someone finally said, "look, we're all getting out here. you're just going to have to wait." her pouting told us she obviously did not like that idea. some people.


When will I ever be that person who says "look, you're just going to have to wait?" or, better yet, the person who turns around and asks the fighting bus-etiquette people to please be quiet until they can act like adults?

Is there some kind of training school for this?

Wide Lawns

I'm a fan of the less drowsy dramamine.

Claire Patrick

HAHA, wow. That was an exceptional story. Horrific for you, I'm sure, but hilarious. Maybe you could write a book with all of your travel stories someday. Or...just compile the already written ones into paperback form.
Something like that.

I hate those stupid TINY planes.


You've reminded me why I need xanax when I fly. Glad everyone made it safe and sound (both real you and impersonating you, too).

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