I am socially awkward and paranoid enough to feel as if someone, at every extended family gathering, dislikes me.
Wordgirl recently wrote a post about this very subject. Granted, as families grow and change due to babies and toddlers and teenagers, I'm sure the dynamics become even more...errr....tricky. So believe me when I say that I don't count myself unfortunate at all when it comes to weird or difficult family members. Truly, my immediate family and my in-laws are all really fun, intelligent people with good personalities and are pretty easy to be around. I'm a lucky girl.
However, I would have to say that the family member I look forward to seeing the least is my husband's uncle. I know I should just get over my fear of him; I know that he means no ill-will towards me and probably thinks of me about as often as he does his semi-annual dentist appointment. And yet? I am afraid of him.
The first time this uncle met me was at my brother-in-law's medical school graduation and he didn't hug me or shake my hand or even look me in the eye. I didn't understand why, especially since I had heard all sorts of stories about how this guy was fun and funny and great to be around. We all took our seats for the graduation ceremony, and I proceeded to consider every possible reason the uncle didn't like me. About 6 hours and 17,000 new-doctor-congratulatory-addresses later, the family was all standing around, saying goodbye. I had changed out of my Gap sundress into a t-shirt and jeans, and the uncle came up, looked me straight on, gave me a stiff hug, and informed me that he was "glad I had decided to put some clothes on". I was completely mortified.
Because really - it was a sundress! From the Gap! The GAP!
So how about you? What extended family member do you worry about seeing the most and why?
When a step-relative (none of us were emotionally attached) died, my mother and various others -- my uncles, my dad, my brother, and Kyle -- were all sitting around in the lobby during the casket viewing. We were (rudely) laughing, then one of us comments that maybe we should "quiet it down," and the Aunt (who isn't soft-spoken) says: "It's not like we're gonna wake 'er up."
(And which uncle said that to you??)
Posted by: Amy | November 06, 2006 at 07:42 PM
I hardly ever see my extended family on my dad's side, and while they are for the most part nice people, they are known for being a bit odd and not participating in conventional things such as, oh, RSVPing for weddings. My sister found that one out the hard way. I am kinda half expecting some random uncle to show up at my wedding with no notice.
Posted by: janet | November 06, 2006 at 07:50 PM
My Uncle. 73, NEver married,not attractive, not funny, fat, balding, lump on head and scaley arms. Without fail he hugs me ( too hard, too long) and says " Come 'ere you, PHWARRRR! If I wasn't your uncle......" OMG.
Posted by: Helen | November 06, 2006 at 11:39 PM
really i just got caught up in thinking about how awful those graduations are. i sat in (most likely) the very place you did, one year later, and endured the same thing for jeremy. luckily jeff was in a wedding for my sister in law's (this past may) and we didn't have to go... again.
Posted by: heather | November 07, 2006 at 11:28 AM
Oddly enough, I also dread seeing one of my husband's uncles. Not only do you not have any idea whether or not he's drunk or sober at any given time, you also cannot say ANYTHING in front of him without him turning it sexual. For example: some completely innocent comments I made at last year's famliy Christmas get-together were met with replies like this. "Oh, you like to be on top, huh? (Insert loud laugh) and "What...does Josh not pleasure you enough?" (Loud laugh.) Mind you, this was at the FAMILY Christmas party.
Posted by: Hannah | November 07, 2006 at 02:47 PM
This year, I dread seeing my husband's family (yes! all of them!) because I will have to explain over and over again why ONE of my children is in a Catholic school and the other isn't. And I will have to explain that no, we're NOT going back to the Catholic church, and no, Henry will NOT be going to St. Whatsis next year because he has a learning disability, and yes it's sort of like autism but not really and no he will NOT outgrow it and no I don't think his vaccinations "caused" it and . . . .
I drink a lot when I'm around my in-laws. God love them.
Posted by: Susan Wagner | November 07, 2006 at 05:36 PM
If I don't have any annoying relatives that make me uncomfortable...does that mean that I am "that" relative? oh crap....I guess I am.
Posted by: the wack | November 08, 2006 at 03:40 PM