Yeah, your cup is definitely half-empty. You know, what I think might be best is just to consider getting a new cup completely.

First of all, I would like to thank the fabulous SJ, of shenuts fame, who has sent, I don't know, maybe 1.376 million new readers to my site, and done very interesting things to my bandwidth.  Thank you!  And welcome to my blawwwg, if you have never been here before; I am so happy you came!  I only hope you'll look past my last few posts of finance-induced complaining and realize that really, things aren't so bad.  I just complain a lot no matter what.

Isn't that more loveable?

Truth be told, I like to consider myself a realist.  My husband frequently corrects me, saying that what I call realism, the rest of the world likes to refer to as pessimism.  To that I say, whatever, dude.  You optimists can come running to me when your beautifully orchestrated Plan A doesn't work out and hey! you never had a Plan B at all, because why wouldn't Plan A work?  Things always work out, right?  Isn't that how Optimist World works? 

And then when you come running to me, I will be happy to sit down with you and discuss the many ways that the very framework of your life could come crashing down around you.  Need someone to help you think up the worst case scenario?  I am totally your girl.  Are you hoping to create a point-by-point breakdown of just how things have gone awry?  Call me!  What, you just wanted a Plan B?  Hmmm.  I am actually better at....umm, well, you see, what I do is just talk about how bad things are now.  Yeah.  Uh-huh....well, this is kind of awkward, isn't it!  I think you might want to consider outsourcing your Plan B needs.  Yeah, that just isn't what I....well, it just isn't my forte, you know?

Oh Internet, don't you love me already?  I think this is going to be such a beautiful friendship.   

Comments

[regan]

holy shit. you're back!

[elise]

yes, the pressure is officially on :)

[Jerri Ann]

Indeed I did come here via SJ and shenuts! I am the one who can tell you the worst possible scenario and how to get past it.....my cup is ALWAYS half empty! I definitely need a new cup.

[elise]

Glad to know I am not the only one, Jerri Ann.

I will be sure to let my husband know, as well ;)

And thanks for coming!

[Valerie]

my favorite thought: my glass is neither half empty or half full. i ordered a cheeseburger.

[kyle]

hey elise - thanks for the link! i linked you back. (that sounds weird.)

[SummerSicker]

very glad to have found something new to read in the mornings. I like your style, lady. And I think pink flamingos are an excellent lawn ornament. I'm from Florida, you see, and in these parts flamingos are Very Stylish. Especially in a lawn with waist-high grass and perhaps a few old tires for lawn furniture.

[CPA Mom]

Fellow pessimist right here. Drinking out of my pessimist's mug right now. really, it has a line in the middle that says "this glass is now half-empty." its from www.despair.com, my favorite site of all time. I'm looking foward to reading more from you.

[wordgirl]

Maybe we're twins who were separated at birth. I'm a pessimist (married to an optimist), too. I prefer to be called a realist, given that I base my feelings on what usually happens, rather than what I HOPE will happen.

[Laurie]

Hi Elise!
I miss you! It's great to see you writing regularly again!
-Laurie

[Liz (Mom Unscripted)]

I also came here from SJ. I just recently started blogging and I freaking love this blogging community. No one really reads mine and that's just fine!
I live in Louisiana so I can totally relate with Texas Christians although you haven't lived until you experience small town Louisiana, really small town, we're talking strip clubs and Walmart. That's it.