All Or Nothing

Bear In Mind, I Still Don't Have My Camera Cord, and iSight Is Only So Good: Blame Steve Jobs, Not Me

Can you see the little flowery things in the seat cushion pattern?  The one right on the corner, is OLIVE GREEN.  The chair matches it, PERFECTLY.

Sigh.  This photo will never be able to accurately impart the true nature of the Green.  But trust me, it's there.  Squint your eyes, and think of overcooked peas, and military fatigues, and....HORRIBLE GREEN THINGS.

I think this one kind of shows the olive tint.  See, where the light is hitting the chair, right there in the middle?  It looks green.  See?  DON'T YOU SEE IT?

Oh shut up.  It's green.

iSight Is Awesome! Or, The Most Boring Post Ever! (You Choose)

I love my MacBook.  Have I mentioned that?  Because I really love my MacBook.  It has so many interesting features, and I don't even know how to use most of them.  Mainly because I'm dumb. For example, I have been told there is a widget called Flores.  This particular widget is supposed to tell me when I get a new email by blooming prettily as an flowering icon at the bottom of my screen.  Cute, right?  But stupid me, I can't HAVE Flores.  No, as soon as I try to install Flores, the Flores people ask me all sorts of questions about my POP server and various incoming and outgoing mail servers and how to solve the Rubik's cube in UNDER 3.7 minutes and what my original thoughts are on global warning.  Also, how to properly sear beef.  And, as anyone who has eaten with me will attest, I'm not qualified to answer ANY of those questions.

However.  The iSight is delightfully easy to operate (click on the little camera, and it counts down from three!) and so I often take pictures of...well....everything.  Most often, as you'll see, "everything" means "cats".  And this makes "Elise" "boring".  Or, possibly, "crazy".  But, nonetheless, cat pictures!  And different iSight effects!  Yay!

Jill, as shown in the Comic Book effect.

Sophia, as shown in the Colored Pencil effect. 

Elise, as shown in the Pop Art effect.  Don't I look kind of man-ish?

Elise and Jill, as shown in the Sepia effect.  The only way to get Jill to stay anywhere, for any amount of time, is to let her lick your fingers.  She never tires of this, and it's yet another example of her socially deficient personality.

Elise and Jill, as shown in the Black and White effect.  This picture PERFECTLY sums up Jill, and her feelings on the world at large.  See how miserable she looks?  How annoyed, and beaten down by life?  She hates everyone, all the time.  Oh Jill, your life, truly, is difficult.

This is as still as Sophie gets.  I have to hold her down and give her the kiss of death - pressure on the top of her head - for her to sit still at all.  Ever.  Her eyes are yellow and have this funny way of looking like they're narrowed permanently in a glare.  However, Sophie is, far and away, the friendliest, most loving cat I have ever encountered.  In other words, she is the polar opposite of Jill.

My cats, they hate each other.  I keep waiting for the day when they'll be best friends, and will curl up together on the bed and sleep in a cozy ball of felineity.  And all I get in thanks for my dreams of love and peace is this:

"Grooooooowwwwllllllllllll......Grrrrrrrrr....rarururrrrrrrrr...."

"HISSSSSSSSSS!  Hisssssss, hisssSSSSSSS!"

Very pleasant creatures, cats.

 

LOST - And Then The Ominous "Boom" Noise

Yeah, so what.  I started watching Lost, after all this time. 

Yes, I know, you told me it was great, you told me it was addicting, and now you've told me that it totally sucks and is largely plotless and extremely infuriating.  And yet?

I watch.

I began Season One last week.  As expected, I could not control myself and watched all eight episodes I rented in one sitting.  I haven't rented the last two discs of Season One yet, because I haven't had a spare 8-10 hours come up as available, and the idea of me just sitting down to watch one or two at a time is laughable.  I wish I was one of those normal people, you know, the types who can moderate. 

Anyway, I'm not even writing to talk about Lost, and its crystal meth-like appeal.  I only brought it up to show you this:

Looks innocent enough, right?  It's the street you drive down to get to our house.  Nice, serene, leafy....you know, nothing to be afraid of.  Right?

WRONG.  This, my friends, is a wild boar.  A black, wiry, evil-looking, tusky, toothy HOG, circa Lost.

Aka THEY WILL KILL YOU SO YOU'D BEST NOT BE MESSIN' WITH 'EM.

Look!  I ran up beside his carcass and placed a beer can by his head, just so that you could estimate the scariness of his massive size!  I risked my life in doing so.  I hope you're impressed.

Let me tell you how excited I am to discover that this boar, this wild, feral animal, is not an anomaly.  No, no, there are hundreds of these guys, running around and wreaking their boarish havoc in the woods DIRECTLY BEHIND my house.  Well, as long as "directly behind" can mean anything from "relatively near" to "a mile or two away from".  Anyway, if you do watch Lost, you'll remember several scenes featuring the wild boar prominently, scenes that focused on the boar's size, strength, meanness, and KILLER TENDENCIES.  Also, on the fact that boars are apparently good eatin'.  But that's neither here nor there for me, as I do not own a bow and arrow nor a net-trap, nor do I have any inclination whatsoever to hunt and eat from my own backyard.  I wonder where Darwin would put me on his list.

Luckily, I found this site, and my worries have been assuaged.  Anyone who includes the phrases "ARE WILD HOGS DESTROYING YOUR PROPERTY or your CROPS?!  20+ YEARS experience in HOG REMOVAL.  I'll kill'em for FREE!" and "I KNOW HOW TO DO IT SAFELY with RESPECT to the LAND OWNER and PROPERTY!  You provide the land & hogs, I provide the skills and tools to get rid of'em" is a good person to have around in my book. 

And look!  He's from East Texas.  I bet I'll see him at the Wal-Mart real soon.

A Series Of What's New

My precious new nephew, Clark, on his birthday.  He is now nearly two months old and is probably the sweetest, easiest baby I could imagine.  Almost enough to make me consider having a child at some point.  Almost.

Sophia, the kitten Cody and I rescued from the "Cattery". Sophie has informed us that despite the cutesy name, they were actually killing cats at the Cattery.  And could we believe that??

Cody and I went through our house about a month ago, counting pieces of furniture that we actually picked out and bought ourselves.  In the entire house - three bedrooms, living room, breakfast room, dining room, study, and media room - there are two pieces; a little stone coffee table that actually belongs outside, and our bed. 
So these shelves are from Pottery Barn, a place that, upon entering, makes us feel as if we are hemorrhaging money, and therefore is not our normal shopping haunt.  However, my parents gave us (last Christmas!) a $250 gift certificate to PB, and since there is not ONE substantial furniture choice at Pottery Barn for $250, we were stuck either buying two vases and some small decorative item off the sale table, or waiting it out.  And our patience paid off, because about a month ago we found out that Pottery Barn had put their superbly beautiful, hand-carved, deep set crown-molding shelves on sale.  A set of three!  So now our new shelves that we bought ourselves (with money that was given to us, so what) fill up the huge empty blank on the living room wall that we had no idea what to do with.

I cut nine inches off of my hair.  NINE!  So this is definitely new.  

Cody also got a new haircut.  He apparently also got asked the world's most perplexing question immediately before this picture was taken.